kiki
sassy
lozzy
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Filed under: canterbury bulldogs, footy, morons, sonny bill williams | Tags: Posted by Sassy
Oh yeah, the saga continues. Now the Bulldogs have come out guns a-blazing to try and sue Monsieur Feelings and stop him playing for anyone else. But the Supreme Court says they have to find him first.
And I should explain something at this point: If we Errol girls haven’t written anything serious about sbfeelings and his run from tha law it’s because we’re too angry and offended. We hate this whole thing more than when the jukebox at the Judgy eats our $20 and then refuses to play our T Rex, Whitney Houston and Daryl Braithwaite selections.
I’m also a bit worried that the British process-servers they send after him don’t follow the NRL and won’t know where to look for the fleeing Kiwi. That’s why I’ve decided to do everything I can to help Greenberg and the dogs and prepared a brief and informative Sonny Bill Feelings dossier.
Height: 191cm
Weight: 108kg
DOB: 3rd Aug 1985
Distinguishing features: approx. 95 Polynesian cultural tattoos
approx. 1 x douchebag ‘WILLIAMS’ tattoo across upper back
1 x Dora the Explorer backpack
Appearance: Likely sporting trenchcoat, fedora, look of confusion, and vacant stare.
Artist’s Rendering
Last Sighting: Heathrow Airport, London.
Suggested search areas:
Leicester Square area, central London. Suspect reported to be mesmerised by locations with brightly-coloured and/or flashing lights.
London Aquarium, likely attempting to commune with sea creatures.
Madame Tussaud’s Waxworks. Suspect believed to hold an affinity with David Beckham. May attempt to seek Beckham’s advice before deciding on future movements.
Buckingham Palace Forecourt. May attempt to meet the Queen.
Tate Modern Gallery. Namely, playing in the ‘Embankment’ exhibition. (Wheeee!)
Special case considerations: Target is not fluent in English. Do not try and engage verbally. Sign-language advisable.
35 Comments so far
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bahaha.
oh sassy.
Comment by jade monique July 29, 2008 @ 12:52 am“London Aquarium, likely attempting to commune with sea creatures.”
SNORT
ah sassy you just keep getting funnier
Comment by lozzy July 29, 2008 @ 1:00 amhahahah omg this is so great.
Comment by Hazy July 29, 2008 @ 1:30 amappppppppparentley he was doing an ectivity at the london pier but they would not let him keep it so he burnt the place down???
*may be a rumor*
Comment by Adam the Queenslander July 29, 2008 @ 3:13 amSonnnnnyyyy Biiiiill, come hoooommmee! Your tarooo is getting coooold.
Comment by Jessica July 29, 2008 @ 3:15 amaw, no way mum. I’m heppy here!
http://news.filefront.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/runaway.jpg
Comment by sassy July 29, 2008 @ 3:25 amIf I was a betting man, and I am, I’d be putting the house on SBW being found at The Church.
Comment by alex July 29, 2008 @ 4:52 amHAHA oh shit. Wifey this is too too lolz.
I would like to see sbw trying to figure out the tube. Uts a train? Endergrend? Bet where is the tube thung? Us it mede of plestic? Won’t the train mult the plestic?
*tiny pea brain explodes*
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 6:47 amHAHAHAH kizzy
Comment by lozzy July 29, 2008 @ 6:51 amoh yeh, i can make phonetic fun of kiwis too. AH HAH!
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 7:34 amlol at everything!
"1 x douchebag 'WILLIAMS' tattoo across upper back" -> not a truer word has been typed.
I mean, he didn't even get it done in a tough looking font!
Girly runaway… (no offence ladies)!
Comment by bart July 29, 2008 @ 7:35 amsassy thats so mean of you. its not douchey. you know full well before the Dogs let SBW out on his own they had to brand him so he didn’t forget his own name.
if only they had have installed the microchip i suggested we could just hop on a GPS and find him immediately.
last time i offer you my help Folkesy!
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 7:55 amit is a truth universally acknowledged that anyone with their own name tattooed on is a douche.
(sorry mitchell pearce, I love you, but it’s true).
Comment by sassy July 29, 2008 @ 8:01 amI heard ( maybe misheard) they have frozen his bank account or something… what’s he to do for money!
Comment by Hazy July 29, 2008 @ 8:18 amhahaha…oh sonny bull…i thought he was maori? this coming from a part-maori..hm. i love your blog. there was footage of him looking dazed & confuzed at le airport on da news.
Comment by bijoux July 29, 2008 @ 8:35 ambahah of course he looked confused! poor sonny bull. he was probably wondering why things aren’t all upside down in the other hemisphere.
as far as I know he’s part samoan, part maori and part whitey. BUT I could definitely be wrong. I just pick a different ethnicity every time I blog about him and hope for the best.
Comment by sassy July 29, 2008 @ 8:37 amim pretty sure he is part samoan, part white and part maori. 100% idiot.
ps HI NEW FAN!
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 8:41 amsassy stop sharing my brain.
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 8:42 amKiki you are an idiot. No wonder SBW left Sydney to escape vacuous fools like you stewing in the barren wasteland of Sydney’s suburbs.
South of France or Sydney’s wastelands?
No doubt you will delete this post, you lot can give it out but can’t take it, you are piss weak.
Comment by Not Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 9:55 amwe have never deleted any hate posts from you! we love it!
i like how you use different untraceable names though. its really brave. also how you keep coming back to read the blogs of vacuous idiots. SWEET.
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 10:06 amactually we love our anonymous abusive poster(s)! if you look you’ll see we even give them shoutouts on our facebook wall.
bet that makes you feel special darlin. that’s what’s missing in your life, isn’t it? poor baby.
Comment by sassy July 29, 2008 @ 10:07 amsrsly. this shared brain thing is getting out of control.
Comment by sassy July 29, 2008 @ 10:08 amalso the suburbs are anything but barren. the recent rain has really greened things up around here!
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 10:13 amYes very special thank you Sassy. What a nice person you are.
Comment by The guy that you don't like July 29, 2008 @ 10:15 amHe appreciates you like nobody else does or ever will, sassy.
Comment by Bec. July 29, 2008 @ 10:20 amBAHA i love that hes lurking around on errol waiting for us to reply. awesome.
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 10:21 amKiki you are Awesome. When you took the piss out of SBW’s accent, I mean that was priceless, comedy gold. Rove himself could hardly be funnier.
Comment by Sassy's No 1 fan July 29, 2008 @ 10:30 amsweet, i cant wait to win a gold logie!
Comment by Kiki July 29, 2008 @ 10:46 amYou must be a New Zealander then… Only a New Zealander would take offense to their hilarious accent.
Is that you SBW?
Comment by Hazy July 29, 2008 @ 11:47 amSass you are the beez kneez sweetheart. “Sonny Bill Feelings” I loled outloud and made an ar$e of myself but I dont care.
Big ups to you for attracting “The Man” to your blog (surly noone else would be sticking up for Money Bill). You truly have made it to the big time now
Comment by Joker's Wild July 30, 2008 @ 4:29 amI heard Anthony on the radio today talking about the situation, and i can honestly say that the only thing i got from him was that..i could not understand a word he was saying.
And i was at work all day, so i heard it several times during the various news broadcasts. At one point i stopped what i was doing, pressed my headphones into my ears, turned the sound up as far as it would go, and still nothing.
ENUNCIATE ANTHONY, FOR THE SWEET LOVE OF GOD!
How can he and Money Bill Williams understand each other? It’s a mystery.
Comment by Bec. July 30, 2008 @ 5:01 am“ENUNCIATE ANTHONY, FOR THE SWEET LOVE OF GOD!”
I imagine you slapping down a ruler or something when you say that.
I like to think they communicate in clicks and whistles or something. like dolphins.
Comment by sassy July 30, 2008 @ 5:47 amThey communicate in fists and this is why I love both those champions.
Comment by alex July 30, 2008 @ 9:43 amWell apparently SBFeelings turned up at Toulouse OK but whatever he talent he was rumoured to have got lost in transit.
Comment by Football Club December 23, 2008 @ 7:13 ami l0ve you
Comment by amira June 13, 2009 @ 7:16 pm